Pop Guru's Annual Oscar Fashion Review!

Well, the beauty of borrowing internet is that it's unpredictable - I couldn't post my fashion review last night because my internet was out.  Guess I should pay for it!  What a fab show on Sunday!  Hugh Jackman, in all his girlish glory, actually did a pretty good job as the host.  I really liked the musical numbers, and what would any award show be without Beyonce forcibly thrusting herself into the spotlight.  The Oscars have nothing to do with you, you egotistical maniac!   You and Mama Tina need to realize the Dreamgirls moment has passed and finally accept the fact that Jennifer Hudson aka "American Idol" has an Oscar and you never will!  Beyonce is one unnecessary parade away from being Tyra Banks.

Although the show was ridiculously long, I loved the way past Oscar winners came out to introduce each nominee in the main categories.  Ben Stiller's impersonation of Joaquin Phoenix was hysterical and finally convinced me it's all a hoax.  My favorite moment by far was when Kate Winslet yelled out, "Dad, whistle or something so then I'll know where you are!"  So cute, and I'm really so happy for her that she was finally given the award she deserved.  Although, not so happy she chose such a matronly dress and hairdo.  Just cause you got the golden statue doesn't mean you need to dress like a Golden Girl!

I know I'm not the only one who thought it was cold hearted that they showed Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie during Jennifer Aniston's moment on stage. It was expected but I thought The Oscars might be better than that - boy, was I wrong! That was just so tacky. I absolutely loved Jennifer's hair, although it was "Hills" hair and I'll just have to come to terms with my support of that. Oh, who am I kidding?! I sport a ginormous Lauren Conrad Mark by Avon ring!

Now on to the fashion... Wasn't much to look at this year!  Most of it was humdrum or flat out ugly.  I'm talking about you, Miley.  I'm not sure if the stars are pulling a Nicolette Sheridan and being their own stylists because of the recession, but whatever the reason, they need a fashion bailout plan FAST!

Best Dressed:

Though Tina Fey didn't walk the red carpet, she was one of the most stunning of the night!  This dress fit her like a glove and it was just the right amount of cleavage, not overboard like she was at the Golden Globes!

Diane Lane hardly looked a day over 40! This really doesn't do her justice because she glowed on TV!

Taraji P. Henson was so cute and grateful to even be at The Oscars, but she really pulled off a classic red carpet look.  I loved her hair!  The small red handbag added just the right pop of color to the crisp white dress.

Ugh, as much as I hate to say nice things about Skeletor, I liked this ensemble.  Classic black dress with a grandiose flair by pairing it with sparkling green earrings.  I thought Debbie Matenopolus was going to hurl herself from the scaffolding upon Angelina Jolie when she arrived.  Debbie actually forgot she was on TV and started screeching "ANGIE!!!" and jumping up and down.  Like a real professional.  Debbie was having a major sugar rush from the one Skittle she had eaten that day, so her hysteria when she saw her Anorexia Idol was completely understandable.

By far the best and most fabulous of the night!  Natalie Portman dared to wear a flashy color, yet didn't overdo it a la Heidi Klum and opted for minimal jewelry.  Sophisticated yet bold - ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS!

Worst Dressed:

Let ze Heidi Klum drape zeself in a red satin sheet that corresponds with ze gazillion Diet Coke Heart Healthy commercials that aired during ze telecast - no one will ever be ze wiser to ze subliminal messaging!  Oh Zack Morris, how you have taught me so much in ze ways of wiling women!  Auf wiedersehen!

Why must such a gorgeous girl pick such a terrible dress!  Freida Pinto has chosen gorgeous dresses all season long, and now she chooses this wretched thing with the mono sleeve?  Ew.  I have never been a fan of the one sleeve look - sleeves are meant to come with a partner or not at all!

Aside from looking like a rock opera costume gone wrong, Marion Cotillard's dress can't seem to decide if it wants to be short or long.  It cuts off mid-thigh, then decides to vomit out a mountain of tulle.  

Um, no.  Vanessa Hudgens looks like a teen Elvira.  Why must Disney Teens invade my award shows?  Doesn't she have a Nickelodeon's Kid Choice Awards she should be at right now?

Miley Cyrus = Hot Mess.  I don't even know what this is.  I feel as if it is something that might come from the sea, some kind of crackwhore mermaid emerging from the water to post YouTube videos and slowly destroy humanity.

This picture proves we should never let Whoopi Goldberg out of her cage.

Sarah Jessica Parker aka Wedding Barbie came out to play.

So did her boobs.

Be careful, Zac Efron.  We've watched a young hunk stop washing his hair and lose his charming good looks once before.  It can be a gradual decent into the pits of Bonaduce, but it can happen to you...

Just ask Mickey Rourke.

Photos: AP Images

OSCARS TONIGHT AT 8 ON ABC!

Hello, hello! Hope everyone is pumped about the Oscars tonight!! I know I am! I'm already watching the E! Preshow coverage. OMG - please stop grabbing your boobs, Debbie Matenopolous. Ugh, can't stand her. No wonder Barbara Walters kicked her off "The View." Anyhow, there's supposedly going to be a lot of suprises tonight - I sure hope so! I mean, not of the Chris Brown a la Grammys style, but you know something scandalous like a Brangelina-Aniston run in. Should be a fun night! Sidenote: Speaking of surprises, Nicole Richie and Joel Madden are going to have another baby. Perhaps a sis for little Harlow.

Tonight's host is Hugh Jackman. Ol' Twinkle Toes is going to wow us with his singing and dancing, apparently trying to keep the entertainment as low budge as possible. Remember his musical CBS show "Viva Loughlin"? Yeah, nobody does since it was cancelled after one episode. I don't know if the world can handle any more of his musical stylings...

I gave some predictions after the nominations were announced, but just as a refresher:

Best Actor:
Richard Jenkins - The Visitor
Frank Langella - Frost/Nixon
Sean Penn - Milk
Brad Pitt - The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Mickey Rourke - The Wrestler

Showdown! The media is abuzz that this will be a head-to-head match between Mickey Rourke and Sean Penn. Rourke has been taking home all of the awards, including the Independent Spirit Award last night. He gave a bit of a rambling speech about his dog Loki that died last week and Eric Roberts, who he claims is one of the best actors around. If Eric Roberts is a fantastic actor, then Tila Tequila deserves to be noted for her amazing skills as an actress. Please. But we all know Mickey likes his "candy," which obviously leads to his rambling and fashion choices. The video is entertaining though - definitely take a look.

Sean Penn did a fantastic job in Milk. It really was a good film and he embodied Harvey Milk perfectly. He's always the media's Prince of Awards, so he may just take home the gold. It will be a fight to the finish between these two.

Best Actress:
Anne Hathaway - Rachel Getting Married
Angelina Jolie - Changeling
Melissa Leo - Frozen River
Meryl Streep - Doubt
Kate Winslet - The Reader

This could be a toss-up. Every one of these women have been voted to win by the media outlets, so it could be a shock who wins. Anne Hathaway is so young, so I think it would be great for her to be given time to continue to hone her skills. It's most likely going to come down to Kate Winslet and Meryl Streep. Kate did a phenomenal job in The Reader. I loved her in that movie and definitely think she should win. But damn, does that girl love to be naked! I've seen her naked more than I've seen myself. She did just say she's going to stop with all the nudity in her films, but we'll see if she can stand the feel of clothing for too long.

Best Supporting Actor:
Josh Brolin - Milk
Robert Downey Jr. - Tropic Thunder
Philip Seymour Hoffman - Doubt
Heath Ledger - The Dark Knight
Michael Shannon - Revolutionary Road

It seems like every category this year is unpredictable! This one will come down to Heath Ledger and Josh Brolin. Though Ledger is somewhat of a shoe-in, the media has been pushing for Brolin to win as of late. He did a great job playing the unhinged Dan White in the film, but the award could go to Ledger as people are wanting to honor him.

Best Supporting Actress:
Amy Adams - Doubt
Penelope Cruz - Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Viola Davis - Doubt
Taraji P. Henson - The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Marisa Tomei - The Wrestler

I'm pretty certain this award will go to Penelope Cruz. Though I think she's terrible in most everything else, she was wonderful in Vicky Cristina Barcelona. She really added the pizazz to the film. I feel like she always wears the same style dress in light pink, so let's hope she opts to add some pizazz to her ensemble tonight.

Best Picture:
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Frost/Nixon
Milk
The Reader
Slumdog Millionaire

Ah, the moment you've all been waiting for... My choice is Slumdog Millionaire, but I will still be a happy camper if The Reader takes home the gold. I loved both films and think they are both worthy of the win. Slumdog was more heartwarming though and has swept all of the award shows so far. Milk stands a chance, but not so sure it will be able to beat these other two. Curious Case has the most nominations with thirteen so it's bound to win something, just not this category. Frost/Nixon was good, but the film lost a lot of the power that the live performance had. The pivotal part when Nixon admits his wrongdoing is more of a passing moment, while it packed much more of a punch in the play. Worth seeing, but not worth the gold.

We'll see who wins tonight when the show starts at 8pm on ABC! I can't wait! Time to go prepare my dish for the Oscar Party! I'm so pumped about tonight's festivities. I'm most excited about the glamourous dresses, and of course the chance to judge celebrities! Look for my fashion update tomorrow. Everyone enjoy the show tonight!! I'll be Twittering throughout so follow me @PopGuru!

SAG Fashion Awards

Now that's what I like about an award show - two hours and we're out of there! I was all settled into my couch for at least another hour and a half, so I was shocked (yet delighted) when it ended at 10pm. "30 Rock" swept the categories again - not surprised, but it's such a fantastic show that it definitely deserves the recognition. Was anyone else as confused as I was when Sean Penn was giving his speech? "Thank you. Good evening, Comrades. That was for O'Reilley." Bill O'Reilley? Because then you go on to say all these wonderful things about gay rights and accepting others - neither of which seem to be anything Bill O'Reilley would support. But sure, I can see how the two of you would be buddies. Drinking, ranting, dirty talk to inanimate objects - like a cell phone or Madonna.


Meryl Streep's speech was unexpected - Well, at least she sure as hell wasn't expecting it as she was guzzling down wine all night chatting up the crowd in her pantsuit. I've never seen someone so drunk on stage! And I'm obviously including Courtney Love circa "The Roast of Pamela Anderson." It was great! I felt like I was watching one of my friend's normally poised mothers jump on stage to sing karaoke after only a "few sips of wine" at a wedding. Mmmhmm... Well, bravo, Meryl! You certainly were the entertainment of the night! But let us not forget the fashion...

Best Dressed:

Of course, the BEST DRESSED OF THE NIGHT AWARD goes to the magnificent Kate Winslet! This dress fits her like a glove, it's classy, and it's a gorgeous color that stands out against the red carpet. CONGRATS, GIRL!

Now this has a very grandiose air about it, which naturally makes me LOVE IT! And it's in my favorite color - major plus!

Taraji P. Henson looks lovely in white! But the back is the best part of this dress.

Laura Linney has never wowed me in the past with her fashion choices, but lately she has chosen beautiful colors and silhouettes that suit her so well. Love the one shoulder/coral combo!

Anne Hathaway made a wise choice this week with a light Grecian dress - rather than a heavy black flower and lace motif straight from hell. Very wise, girl. Also, I like the hair.

Worst Dressed:

CAUTION: Please avert your eyes from Skeletor!!!

I mean, eat. Your intricate tattoos are disappearing into your rib cage. Just because you are helping starving children in other countries, that doesn't mean you can't chew on a celery stick every once in a while. And nice navy bedsheet. Really? That's what you chose to wear to the SAGs. Like, "oh, I can't be bothered to even try to look good - because even when I don't try I'm still the most beautiful there." Um, no. You look like The Corpse Bride - after she died and roamed the world as a zombie. Let's pick up the pace for the Oscars, Angie. Or you'll have to answer to me!

Amy - Um, honey , I don't really know where to start. Why must you always choose these drab colors? You either wear nude, garnet, or plum. Live it up - let's get some flashy colors on you, girl! We all know pale is hard to work with, but girl, I haven't seen the sun in 3 years and still at least make an effort. And always remember to leave the bundle of grapes at home - not under your boobs.

U-G-L-Y, you ain't got no alibi. That dress is ugly, yeah, yeah, it's ugly!

Not so bad from the front, right?

Wrong! That horrid corsage went all the way down the back and then vomited on her ass! Marisa - you know better, girl! And have you lost your mind? It's an awards show. People will see you! Put on some mascara and lipstick, for goodness sakes! Geez - I have so much to teach celebrities...

Photos: AP Images

Criss Angel & Holly Madison Vacay in Cabo - with Paula Abdul

Now for Criss Angel news. There's something you don't hear everyday! The Mindfreak himself has been shacking up with Holly Madison (Hef's former first lady) at ME Cabo Resort in Cabo, San Lucas. They've been working on their tans and partying at ME Cabo's Passion Club for a couple of days now and plan to be there for over a week - guess things are getting serious! Criss is taking a break from his Vegas show 'Believe' - because even Mindfreaks need some R&R from time to time. Holly's taking a break from, well, I don't think she does anything but tan or bang old men and D-list celebrities for fame. So this is sort of like a working vacation for her.

But what crazy train is ever complete without Paula Abdul?! She joined her good friends for a few days away from "American Idol" and some fun in the sun - because tanning next to Ryan Seacrest in a thong is stress enough. ME Cabo gave her the full treatment with "American Idol" cakes and showing her taping of the night's show. Paula can't relax on vacation without focusing on herself! Here are the exclusive pics of the gang hanging by the pool:



The ME Resorts are mighty popular with the celebs lately! Mischa Barton is currently staying at ME Madrid to promote an Herbal Essences campaign. Rob Schneider is also bunking up there for a press junket - and because he figured he could get Sandler some good Herbal Essences swag.

It's Official - The Oscar Noms Announced!

Hola everyone! I hope you are all celebrating what a momentous week this has been! What's more important than the Oscar nominations being announced? Nothing! That's right - the official 2009 nominations for Academy Awards were announced today and the best award show of the season is underway. Designers are scrambling to get their best dresses to the nominees. People are planning their speeches in case they win. And Tom Cruise is busy trying to find someway to get an invite and pretend he has a legit excuse to be there. Because Scientology is always welcome on the red carpet. Here's the list of nominees:

Best Actor:
Richard Jenkins - The Visitor
Frank Langella - Frost/Nixon
Sean Penn - Milk
Brad Pitt - The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Mickey Rourke - The Wrestler

Every one of these nominations was expected, but I was blindsided when I saw Richard Jenkins was nominated. This is the man that everyone recognizes, but no one has a clue what his name is or what else he's been in (with the exception of geeks like me). He's steadily been in almost everything you've seen in television or film since the '90s - Flirting with Disaster, It Could Happen to You, "Six Feet Under", North Country, Rumor Has It, Step Brothers, Burn After Reading... The list goes on and on. You've seen him and thought - "Hey, who is that guy?" But he rarely gets more than the bat of an eyelash. Which is unfortunate because he was great in "Six Feet Under" and Burn After Reading. I haven't seen The Visitor, but I certainly will now that Richard Jenkins is finally getting the recognition he deserves after 30 years in the industry. The underdog story is always appealing to the masses, and I think his win would be a fantastic one for the people. Bravo, Richard!

Best Actress:
Anne Hathaway - Rachel Getting Married
Angelina Jolie - Changeling
Melissa Leo - Frozen River
Meryl Streep - Doubt
Kate Winslet - The Reader

Anne Hathaway and Kate Winslet - get ready to duke it out for this one! All are great actresses (though never heard of Melissa Leo until now), but the press has been gunning for these two ladies to take home the gold since last summer. Be prepared to hear a lot more about Anne and Kate over the next month - not that that's a bad thing! Kate looks amazing in the new issue of InStyle, btw.

Best Supporting Actor:
Josh Brolin - Milk
Robert Downey Jr. - Tropic Thunder
Philip Seymour Hoffman - Doubt
Heath Ledger - The Dark Knight
Michael Shannon - Revolutionary Road

Wow - really? Robert Downey Jr.? I totally understood the Golden Globe nom and felt it was legit if he won, but comedic performances typically have a touch chance at the Oscars. He did a good job in that movie, I just really did not like Tropic Thunder. I guess I shouldn't fault him for being associated with Tom Cruise... It's just so hard! I still haven't gotten over Meryl Streep agreeing to be in Lions for Lambs with him. We'll see if Robert Downey Jr. can surpass Heath Ledger though - the noms were announced on the one year anniversary of his death.

Best Supporting Actress:
Amy Adams - Doubt
Penelope Cruz - Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Viola Davis - Doubt
Taraji P. Henson - The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Marisa Tomei - The Wrestler

Man, I need to see Doubt. They are all over these awards! Ok - that's my mission this week. Though I can't stand her, I'm happy Penelope Cruz was nominated because she really was the dominant force in Vicky Cristina Barcelona. See! I can be kind to those I hate! I'm not so evil... (Hear that, Tyra?) However, I don't really understand why Taraji P. Henson's role in Curious Case was that big of a deal? She played a mother - that's about it. She did well, but it wasn't the part of the movie that I thought much about. There's a lot of critics that would disagree with me on that, but whatevs!

Best Picture:
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Frost/Nixon
Milk
The Reader
Slumdog Millionaire

And the winner is... Pink Panther 2! J/K - My vote goes to Slumdog Millionaire. I loved this film! If you haven't seen it, I suggest you brave the cold and get yourself to a theater...STAT! And if you've seen Curious Case... Well, you may have enjoyed it more the first time you saw it... When it was called Forrest Gump. This video points out the similarities, none of which I noticed!

Of course, I'm participating in Pop Guru's Oscar Challenge again this year for the fourth year running. I have to see every film nominated for Best Picture before the Academy Awards so I can have an educated opinion on who should win. It's the one time of year my opinions are based on solid facts and research, so cherish the moment. They're still unsolicited, but nonetheless, knowledgeable. I challenge you all to participate in this contest as well! You get nothing in return except an empty wallet and a fat ass from all the popcorn you consume, but it's worth it! You have one month until the big day - The Academy Awards air February 22 at 8pm EST on ABC.

2009 Pop Guru Golden Globe Fashion Awards!

Last night's Golden Globes show was full of surprises! Congratulations to Kate Winslet on her dual win!!! Her acceptance speech was wonderful when she won for Revolutionary Road. New favorite word: "Gather!" She is just the most genuine lady in Hollywood and deserves to actually take home an award for once. Also, so ecstatic that Slumdog Millionaire won! They definitely deserved Best Motion Picture and I urge you all to go see it. It might not be in every town now, but I'm betting it will be getting a much wider release this weekend.

I was a little shocked that Anna Paquin won for Best Actress in a TV Series - Drama, however, I'm a fan of the show so I was ok with the decision. I was happy Mad Men didn't sweep the show like I had expected! Not that I don't like Mad Men, it's just not fun when the same show wins every award. Though bravo to 30 Rock for their three wins - Best Comedy, Tina Fey, and Alec Baldwin! I shed a few tears when Neal Patrick Harris lost Best Supporting Actor for How I Met Your Mother. Barney Stinson is a legendary man of honor and should have taken home the gold. Robbed, robbed I tell you! However, for your viewing pleasure, I have provided the funniest sketch from NPH's stint on SNL last weekend - Orchestral Doogie Howser.

Now on to my Fashion Awards. I found my jaw hitting the table when I saw most of the horrendous outfits - not to forget that hair - coming down the red carpet. I know we are in a recession, but damn - don't skip out on mirrors!

Best Dressed Awards:

Laura Linney positively glowed in this yellow dress that matched her hair, and her award! She looked like she loved the dress and was, most importantly, comfortable.

OK, she could have taken a second to brush her hair, but I still loved this pink dress on Cameron Diaz.

Eva Longoria Parker was one of the few that dared to wear a bright color and she pulled it off magnificently!

I loved the neutral color Elizabeth Banks utilized with both her dress and her makeup.

Kate Winslet was elegant in her classic black gown - and I loved her lipstick! I'll be reading all the magazines to find out exactly what kind of lip color she used. She's just fab.

Worst Dressed Awards:
Too many to count. Stylists must have cut back on their cocaine usage due to the economy and opted for huffing glue instead judging by these choices. Here are just a few of my faves...

My favorite quote of the night what my friend Chris said when Renee Zellweger walked on stage: "What was Sharon Stone thinking?!" She looked ridonkulous with her peek-a-boo top and rat's nest hair. She really never tries to get back on my good side. Your loss, Renee.

Horrendous dress, Morticia Adams. The drab lipstick and slick-back do add to the harshness of the overall look.

When Emma Thompson asked Sally Hawkins if she needed help, I wasn't sure if it was with her speech or with her dinner. She's terribly skinny - eat something, girl!

Two words: HOT MESS. Head-to-toe.

A blue animal print dress is never complete without a giant flower. Train wreck.

Not a fan of this look - Betty Boop with a side of S&M.

And I saved the absolute BEST for last...

Glenn Close in her Asian pantsuit getup. Obviously she's in early stages of dementia.

Don't forget about her twin, Tony Shalhoub! So cute that they dressed alike.

Worst Hair Awards:

In honor of the travesty that was the red carpet last night, I decided to add a new category to the mix...

Everyone gasped in horror when Drew Barrymore stepped onto the red carpet last night. Remember the tragic green dress sans bra incident? I don't know which was worse... And why couldn't Jessica Lange and Drew detach from each other the entire night? I know you play mother and daughter in Grey Gardens, but that's no excuse for the creepy hand-holding. Sweet shades, Jess.

Warning: this is what happens if you stick a fork in a toaster.

Brigitte Nielsen looks great for forty-five.

The Bride of Chuckie's frazzled ponytail really added the soft touch that this loud dress needed. I would have given her a hairnet if she sat at my table.

Oh, she's just being Miley. Next time the presenter announces your name, your publicist might be a bit happier if you politely smiled like a lady, not stuck out your tongue. I'm so over this long extension look - when it becomes a staple in Tyra's wardrobe, you know that shit is tired. And please look at Mama Cyrus in the background - she and Miley should have switched dresses.

Don't worry - I didn't forget Ashton Kutcher's fu manchu! Winner of Worst Hair of the Night!

Beautiful Men Awards:
A little something extra for the ladies, or the men. So many beautiful men were in attendance last night that I thought I'd give you one final look at just a few...

Wonder from Down Under - Simon Baker

Jon Hamm and his girlfriend, Jennifer Westfeldt

Gerard Butler

Zachary Quinto

My favorite, Aaron Eckhart

Hahaha J/K - couldn't resist throwing Mickey Rourke into the mix!

Photos: AP Images