Monday, January 12, 2009

2009 Pop Guru Golden Globe Fashion Awards!

Last night's Golden Globes show was full of surprises! Congratulations to Kate Winslet on her dual win!!! Her acceptance speech was wonderful when she won for Revolutionary Road. New favorite word: "Gather!" She is just the most genuine lady in Hollywood and deserves to actually take home an award for once. Also, so ecstatic that Slumdog Millionaire won! They definitely deserved Best Motion Picture and I urge you all to go see it. It might not be in every town now, but I'm betting it will be getting a much wider release this weekend.

I was a little shocked that Anna Paquin won for Best Actress in a TV Series - Drama, however, I'm a fan of the show so I was ok with the decision. I was happy Mad Men didn't sweep the show like I had expected! Not that I don't like Mad Men, it's just not fun when the same show wins every award. Though bravo to 30 Rock for their three wins - Best Comedy, Tina Fey, and Alec Baldwin! I shed a few tears when Neal Patrick Harris lost Best Supporting Actor for How I Met Your Mother. Barney Stinson is a legendary man of honor and should have taken home the gold. Robbed, robbed I tell you! However, for your viewing pleasure, I have provided the funniest sketch from NPH's stint on SNL last weekend - Orchestral Doogie Howser.

Now on to my Fashion Awards. I found my jaw hitting the table when I saw most of the horrendous outfits - not to forget that hair - coming down the red carpet. I know we are in a recession, but damn - don't skip out on mirrors!

Best Dressed Awards:


Laura Linney positively glowed in this yellow dress that matched her hair, and her award! She looked like she loved the dress and was, most importantly, comfortable.

OK, she could have taken a second to brush her hair, but I still loved this pink dress on Cameron Diaz.

Eva Longoria Parker was one of the few that dared to wear a bright color and she pulled it off magnificently!

I loved the neutral color Elizabeth Banks utilized with both her dress and her makeup.

Kate Winslet was elegant in her classic black gown - and I loved her lipstick! I'll be reading all the magazines to find out exactly what kind of lip color she used. She's just fab.

Worst Dressed Awards:
Too many to count. Stylists must have cut back on their cocaine usage due to the economy and opted for huffing glue instead judging by these choices. Here are just a few of my faves...

My favorite quote of the night what my friend Chris said when Renee Zellweger walked on stage: "What was Sharon Stone thinking?!" She looked ridonkulous with her peek-a-boo top and rat's nest hair. She really never tries to get back on my good side. Your loss, Renee.

Horrendous dress, Morticia Adams. The drab lipstick and slick-back do add to the harshness of the overall look.

When Emma Thompson asked Sally Hawkins if she needed help, I wasn't sure if it was with her speech or with her dinner. She's terribly skinny - eat something, girl!

Two words: HOT MESS. Head-to-toe.

A blue animal print dress is never complete without a giant flower. Train wreck.

Not a fan of this look - Betty Boop with a side of S&M.

And I saved the absolute BEST for last...

Glenn Close in her Asian pantsuit getup. Obviously she's in early stages of dementia.

Don't forget about her twin, Tony Shalhoub! So cute that they dressed alike.

Worst Hair Awards:
In honor of the travesty that was the red carpet last night, I decided to add a new category to the mix...

Everyone gasped in horror when Drew Barrymore stepped onto the red carpet last night. Remember the tragic green dress sans bra incident? I don't know which was worse... And why couldn't Jessica Lange and Drew detach from each other the entire night? I know you play mother and daughter in Grey Gardens, but that's no excuse for the creepy hand-holding. Sweet shades, Jess.


Warning: this is what happens if you stick a fork in a toaster.

Brigitte Nielsen looks great for forty-five.

The Bride of Chuckie's frazzled ponytail really added the soft touch that this loud dress needed. I would have given her a hairnet if she sat at my table.

Oh, she's just being Miley. Next time the presenter announces your name, your publicist might be a bit happier if you politely smiled like a lady, not stuck out your tongue. I'm so over this long extension look - when it becomes a staple in Tyra's wardrobe, you know that shit is tired. And please look at Mama Cyrus in the background - she and Miley should have switched dresses.

Don't worry - I didn't forget Ashton Kutcher's fu manchu! Winner of Worst Hair of the Night!

Beautiful Men Awards:
A little something extra for the ladies, or the men. So many beautiful men were in attendance last night that I thought I'd give you one final look at just a few...

Wonder from Down Under - Simon Baker

Jon Hamm and his girlfriend, Jennifer Westfeldt

Gerard Butler

Zachary Quinto

My favorite, Aaron Eckhart

Hahaha J/K - couldn't resist throwing Mickey Rourke into the mix!

Photos: AP Images

3 comments:

Chris said...

I have been cracking up over the worst dressed comments!!! hahaha....thanks for giving a little bit of light for the unemployed. Oprah just doesn't cut it these days

Anonymous said...

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Anonymous said...

Have you thought of doing this for a living? Look atwhat Joan Rivers has been doing all these years and you are much better = keep it up

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